Saint by title only, Peter really can’t catch a break. Peter’s been on desk duty for the last…forever. Heaven’s hard to keep track of time it, but it’s been a long time. Peter is looking for an out in the only way he knows how – by letting the wrong people in.


Lucy, or hey, Lucifer if you gotta get all technical, has been playing the same game since humans were made. The Morningstar is ready and willing to take on the Gates themselves, but Peter’s always seemed the easier play. Also he’s more fun to screw with.


Death loves his job. Like. A lot. More than you can imagine. Death’s in it for Death, and he’s been around for a lot longer than anyone else. Well, less time than Lucy. More time than Jesus. Way more time than Peter.


You know that guy that gets paid way more than he should because he’s the bosses’ son? Jesus is that guy. It’s nice, because really, he’ll share all the awesome pot he smokes, but it sucks because he kind of makes you wish you didn’t have to talk to him.